Age-old stereotypes influence people’s everyday thinking whether they realize it or not, and this is often the case when it comes to interpreting female behavior in the workplace. According to the U.S. Department of Labor, women currently make up 46 percent of the U.S. workforce. This is a dramatic change from previous decades, and as a result, has brought several benefits and challenges to the office environment. 

One of the biggest challenges is that women often are judged differently than men for engaging in the same assertive behavior at work. Prescribed female behavior is friendly, warm, and relationship-oriented, whereas men are expected to be assertive and independent. The consequence of this is that when women exhibit more masculine behavior, they often are painted as cold and unlikable.

My research extends these findings to workplace interactions between women, to reveal that conflict among women often is interpreted more negatively by others, perhaps because it violates stereotypes that dictate how women should behave. Meanwhile, competitiveness and conflict among men is dismissed as “boys being boys.” 

These stereotypes leave coworkers and other third parties at work more likely to perceive conflict between women as a dysfunctional issue associated with mutual disliking or jealousy, rather than one stemming from professional performance or the task at hand. 

One step managers can take to deal with this issue is to become more aware of gender stereotypes and the role they play in perceptions of conflict. Managers should ask themselves, “Is this a legitimate task-based conflict between two women, or am I unfairly attributing it to malevolence? What if these were two men? Would I make the same attributions?” Managers who dig further into these questions might locate the real factors at play rather than making assumptions based on their own stereotypes or those of their employees. 

The next step is to reframe workplace conflict in a more positive way to help employees recognize that not all conflict at work is bad. There is such a thing as constructive conflict that focuses on the actual work product, and it can improve task performance and overall problem-solving quality. When employees stop associating conflict with antipathy and accept it as a normal process within the work environment, this allows for more equal perceptions of female versus male same-sex conflict to emerge.

Of course, it shouldn’t be dismissed that some conflict can be destructive to employees and their workplaces. To reduce the frequency of toxic conflict, managers should create conflict scripts and provide opportunities for conflict-resolution training and role playing so that employees know what to do when they find themselves in a potentially toxic conflict.

This training should provide answers to questions like the following: How should one respond to an angry (or passive-aggressive) e-mail? (Answer: Don’t react quickly. Allow for a cooling off period and then respond in person to prevent misunderstandings). How should one confront a coworker with whom they’re upset? (Answer: Use calm and honest but non-accusatory language that focuses on how you feel, not on what your coworker did or didn’t do). When should one seek the counsel of superiors during conflict? (Answer: When attempts to de-escalate the conflict have failed). Note that these strategies need not differ according to gender.

Workplace conflict is a natural part of organizational life, regardless of the gender of those involved. It can even be healthy when employees have the skills to navigate it successfully. When working toward a solution, remember to follow the steps toward becoming more aware of the issues at play and how to handle the conflict in an unbiased manner. 

Leah Sheppard is a Pullman-based assistant professor at Washington State University’s Carson College of Business. Sheppard teaches in the department of management, information systems, and entrepreneurship.